"We stayed in a half-board suite at the PortoBay Hotel Madeira and came away feeling disappointed. While there were some positives, there were too many issues for a hotel in this price range.
Suite
Our first impression of the room wasn’t good. We had been awake since 5 am due to an early flight and had already waited until 2 pm to gain access to our room, so we were simply looking forward to resting. However, as soon as we entered the suite, the bathroom smelled strongly of sewage. The smell was so overpowering that it filled the entire suite, making my wife feel sick and causing me to gag. Instead of being able to relax, we had to wait a few hours while the problem was investigated and repaired.
To the hotel’s credit, two maintenance staff spent around 45 minutes fixing the issue and the smell was completely resolved. However, it is difficult to understand how such a strong smell wasn’t noticed when the room had been cleaned before our arrival.
The bathroom itself was quite nice but was let down by the smell on arrival, the fact there was only half a toilet roll, no bath or hand towels (only pool towels), and a shower over a bath that had clearly seen better days.
Although we had a suite with a built-in kitchenette, it wasn’t really equipped as a kitchenette. There was a small plug-in kettle, but for a hotel at this level I would have expected a coffee machine or at least a cafetière rather than just two small sachets of instant coffee. There was no cupboard space at all to store food, making the kitchenette feel more decorative than practical.
Storage for clothes was generally good, but both wardrobes were positioned on the same side of the bed, making it awkward for two people to get dressed at the same time.
The bed was memory foam and very firm. I found it acceptable, but my wife struggled to sleep because it was much firmer than she is comfortable with. In our experience, very firm beds are quite common in hotels, so this isn’t something unique to PortoBay. Bed firmness is largely a matter of personal preference, but it wasn’t ideal for us.
Food
As we were staying on a half-board basis, breakfast and the evening meal were included.
The evening meals were of good quality, but the choice was limited and the restaurant felt cramped.
One evening I reached for the serving spoon to help myself to some rice to accompany my fish. The bowl was still almost full, but just as I reached for it, the chef picked it up and took it away. It was several minutes before he returned with it. It clearly wasn’t intentional, but it wasn’t very observant. In hotels of this standard I generally find restaurant staff to be very attentive to what guests are doing.
Breakfast was even more cramped than the evening meal despite the restaurant not appearing particularly busy. The breakfast area was very confined, making it difficult to reach the food without constantly getting in each other’s way. On one morning there were no juice glasses available, and even around 30 minutes later they still hadn’t been replenished.
The evening meal was good quality, but the overall food selection was limited. Breakfast was disappointing, both in terms of quality and choice.
Reception and service
Reception was unfortunately the weakest part of our stay.
One evening we ordered a single €5 drink with dinner. We gave our room number and were not asked to sign anything. At around 10:30 pm we found a note that had been pushed under our door asking us to return to the restaurant “at your earliest convenience” to sign the bill. By then the restaurant had already closed, so we intended to sign it the following evening.
The next morning another note was pushed under our door telling us to sign the bill as soon as possible at reception, which seemed inconsistent with the previous request.
My wife went to reception to sign it and was met by a receptionist who was miserable, grumpy and bordering on rude. She explained that we hadn’t realised a signature was required because we had already given our room number and nobody had asked us to sign. The receptionist wasn’t interested in the explanation and bluntly told her that we had to sign for everything. My wife then asked whether that meant we also had to sign for breakfast and was told that she did. It later turned out that this wasn’t true.
The incident upset my wife to the point where she didn’t want to approach reception again for the rest of our stay. Whenever we needed anything, such as additional toilet rolls, I went instead.
Overall, we didn’t find the staff particularly friendly, and the reception experience left a poor impression.
Final thoughts
There were positives. The maintenance team resolved the bathroom problem once it was reported, and the evening meals were of good quality.
However, the limited food choice, cramped dining areas, the poorly equipped kitchenette, the issues with the room on arrival, and the unfriendly experience at reception meant this hotel fell well short of our expectations.
Having stayed in many hotels at a similar price point, we have experienced far better facilities, service and overall value than we found here."
