"A holiday hotel is supposed to provide you with a holiday from life, cooking you good food and providing relaxation. You don't get that here.
We came to the Chia Laguna Village Hotel at short notice when our holiday to Sicily was cancelled because Mount Etna's latest eruption caused the closure of Catania airport, hoping it would be similar to the wonderful Forte Village Resort just a few miles up the road where we stayed last summer which was all booked up. (Read my review here https://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/ShowUserReviews-g608921-d627013-r1029196153-Forte_Village_Resort_Villa_del_Parco_Spa-Santa_Margherita_di_Pula_Pula_Province_.html)
On the face of it they're similar, both being a collection of different 'hotels' in their own 'village' on the beautiful southern coast of Sardinia, with football academies, tennis courts, kids clubs and access to a private beach with turquoise sea. Both are ideally situated to visit the stunning local beaches like Tuerredda
However, that's where the similarity ends.
Chia Village is tiny in comparison and the grounds are nowhere near as beautiful. At Forte Village you can happily wander around for an hour just gawking at the stunning flora and fauna under a canopy of 40' high pine trees. Here the pools are small, there are no waterslides, the pathways are bumpy and in a poor state of repair, and the main restaurant food is frankly awful.
Forte Village is right on the beach whereas from here you need to get a golf cart/shuttle the half mile or so down a very bumpy gravel track to the sea. That said, once you get there, I believe the beach here is better - the sea had washed a lot of the Forte beach away and there was only room for two rows of sunbeds.
Because of the last minute booking we had no option other than a 'garden room', which as you can see shares a path with all the rooms upstairs, so our particular 'garden' had no privacy at all so we never used the 'patio' chairs.
The room itself was tastefully decorated but the bed was far too firm. I woke up in pain every night, as did my partner. Don't come without ibuprofen! The room is pretty small too - there's just one wardrobe with nowhere near enough hanging/drawer space for a couple, and a mini fridge. There's no dressing table, even though they could have fitted one under the tv if they moved the wardrobe, rather than a stupid chair which you'll kick and hurt your toes every time you come out of the bathroom in the dark. The water didn't stay hot enough so I often shaved and showered in tepid/cold water, and there was the beginnings of mould on the bathroom wall. Worse, we could hear every footstep of the people above, with a child that ran up and down the corridor constantly, as well as every man's urination and flush from about four adjacent rooms in the night! A concrete echo chamber is not the best design!
Even the basics weren't covered - the maid would replace the cups each day but not the tea/coffee and milk, so I'd have to go all the way down to the restaurant to get some.
The biggest let down is the breakfast and dinner served in the Domus restaurant. I've never seen such a lack of choice in a buffet, and the available food was very low quality. More often than not it was cold. Just unacceptable really.
They do have some additional choices to the evening buffet. The first night they were doing steak on the BBQ, but by the time they'd sliced it and thrown it in the metal collection tray it was cold so we had to ask them to reheat it. Presumably all the other guests were happy with cold steak! Second night was grilled fish, which were delicious straight off the BBQ, but the potato wedges to go with it were barely warm. Roast pig came next and that was barely edible. The kebabs the next night again were cold. Basically unless you get the food straight off the BBQ it's cold.
Because our flight was delayed we missed dinner on the first night, so the manager kindly offered us a day's 'passport' that usually costs €35 per person, which is effectively a full-board upgrade, so you get lunch in the poolside restaurant and a choice of where to eat your evening meal.
I would definitely recommend spending that money.
Lunch in Mezze was great, with a couple of lovely salads, a burger and fried calamari. Then we had dinner in Sa Mesa. The evening was was far from perfect. I always give praise where it's due, but unfortunately this is not one of those occasions.
Firstly the chairs are spectacularly uncomfortable. Second, the menu offers 'whole local fish', whereas what was served was a tuna steak which is neither local nor a whole fish. When we queried this with Ewa who appeared to be the most senior of the waiting staff she just got cross and refused to speak to us for the rest of the night, even when we had a further complaint that the lemon tart was missing from our dessert. The waiter spoke to her and she told him to tell us 'tough luck, it's not available today'.
The main course was also served with a bowl of raw, inedible vegetables and a cold jacket potato.
If I'd paid the $140 menu price for that meal I'd be furious. It's really not good enough for a five star hotel. More importantly, you can't put 'whole local fish' on the menu and serve a small tuna steak that might as well have come out of the freezer.
As for the wine, it's very overpriced. In Sa Mesa there was only one very average rosé available which cost $48. The same bottle was on sale in the local supermarket for $11. We took home a few bottles of better wine that cost $5.90.
And to add insult to injury, on checking out my bill was full of drinks we didn't have, as well as a 'discretionary service charge' of $57. Given a service charge was already added to every bar and restaurant bill already that's just theft!
In short, this place has its merits, but far too many of the basics are not met. Food is cold, beds are uncomfortable, wine is overpriced, maid service inadequate.
My advice is to spend a little extra and go to the Forte Village. You'll be glad you did.
Oh, and guests are allowed to bring their dogs, so if you're not a dog person then DEFINITELY give this place a swerve."
