Los Zocos Impressive Lanzarote

"This hotel is fine, but I would never come again. Previous reviews about the outside being great to look at are correct. The grounds are well-kept, the pools are good (especially the lap pool), the rooms are a good size and the balconies roomy, but that's really where it stops. On further inspection into the inside of the hotel, that's where the cracks show. The room was shabby, extreme signs of wear and tear and a general feeling of average cleanliness. The bathroom was small but well-worked for that space but I wasn't a fan of the small flies that flew out of the sink hole on a regular basis and whilst the shower was acceptable, the leaky connection at the top meant that I was sprayed with cold water that had sprayed on to the ceiling which proceeded to drip down on to me whilst in the shower. The linens on the bed were fine, but the towels are so thin and worn and the last one I used full of hair that definitely wasn't mine because it was brown / black and I am blonde. The kitchenette was handy to mitigate the mediocrity of the food but the microwave while working had the yellow tinge of age and perhaps even being in a room with smokers. The bed was hard / firm but I no issue with it and while the air-con unit looked like something out of the 70s, it worked. There are marks on the curtains and floor and the room cleaning was clearly no more than a wipe at best, replacing towels and remaking the bed. The acoustics in the room were not great either. I could hear people above and beside me like they were in the room and with the huge contingent of children in the hotel, all you can hear is running back and forth. What I will say though is that the hotel is lovely and quiet after the entertainment has finished. The main dining area is OK and while the taste of the food is passable, there is not much choice and the quality is not great. Beef 'fillet' that takes 25 chews and a non-existent steak knife to even cut. One highlight was the leg of pork, that was delicious, well cooked and very moreish. I have never had a roast on holiday in my life, but I have to say that another small highlight were the yorkshire puddings, not what I would choose as I am not one to seek out British food while on holiday, but at least they were tasty. The comments about the staff being miserable were not too far from the truth with a few exceptions and the clearing of plates in the main dining area was painfully slow at times. One highlight for me was that I decided to upgrade to Premium when I checked in. This meant branded drinks and being able to access to premium bar off the quiet pool. That was where I did have some nice food that was cooked to order. Well worth doing if you can. The service there was great as were the servers, nothing was too much trouble and there was always a smile. The website says that there are 6 pools. This is a reach. There are 2 pools with different sections. The noisy pool - definitely lives up to its nickname - and the quiet pool - depends on how rowdy the children are as to whether this is the case. The entertainment is 'meh'. I understand that it is geared around children in the early to mid evening and they seem to be engaged but the area where it happens is soulless, stuffy and noisy for the wrong reasons. This review implies that I haven't enjoyed my trip, which is not the case, I came to relax and I've achieved that, but while this hotel maybe 4 stars based on its amenities, I would say at best, it is a 3 star."

"This hotel was great there was a livelt pool area and a quite pool area both decent size the food was amazing probably 1 of the best all inclusive food i have had cooked fresh infront of you always enough options and was different all week. Would definatly stay here again"

"Currently in hotel. First half of block 3 you do not see the sun ever. Booked 9 months ago and was allocated room in block 3. No sun ever on balcony. Spoke to management as couples who booked 2/3 weeks ago are in upgraded rooms and paid half what we paid. Management claim hotel is full, as usual, but clearly rooms in other areas are not occupied. Be aware of block 3."